I know this feeling. As a gay man, this has happened to me several times. Once, back in college, a friend of mine and I were invited to a party about an hour away. The girl who invited us needed a ride there. When we finally got to the party, the girl who invited us mentioned "by the way, the host is homophobic so just don't mention you're gay." I wouldn't have gone if I'd known. I felt fear the whole time. I hadn't felt so self conscious since high school. I had to completely compromise my personality and over think everything I said. I felt like I was spiritually suffocated. The crowd was already so different from what I was used to. Aggressive and rude. I think perhaps some people may read our experiences and think there's exaggeration. I promise you, there isn't. Imagine being at a gathering and to even mention that you had a boyfriend, girl friend, wife... husband, or whatever, could actually risk your life. Someone would actually physically harm you over it. I was grateful that my other friend was with me. The host happened to be a black man. I've come to the conclusion that people have a choice on their spiritual path. To hold onto limited beliefs and programming or to relinquish them. It's the choice between fear and love. EGO and Enlightenment. Hating people is punishment enough for those who choose to align with that path. I told the girl who invited me to NEVER do that to me again. And she never did. I think it was a learning experience for her too.